Friday, November 16, 2018

The A-Hole Generation


 
 
Chapter 34

          Yesterday was very hectic. The quarter is ending, and soon it will be time to distribute report cards. That means I spent the entire day running around like a chicken with its head cut off.

          I spoke briefly with one of the Chinese teachers during lunch.

          I said, “Are you going with the plus and minus system, or are you merely plugging in A’s and B’s and C’s and D’s?”

          He said, “All that plus and minus stuff is too complicated for a Chinese person. I’m keeping it simple.”

          “Fair enough. I guess I’ll do the same thing.”

          Suddenly, the eleventh-grade math teacher tapped on my shoulder. She had a belligerent expression etched upon her fat face

          “Do you let the twelfth graders use their phones?”

          “Not usually. Only when they are looking up vocabulary words.”

          “Well, Tim’s in your room, and he’s surfing the web.”

          I nodded. “Tim’s a special case. The principal and I have already agreed that he’s crazy and needs to be treated gently. I’ll talk to him later.”

          “That’s not fair to the other children. He must obey the rules just like everybody else. I’ll go discuss the matter with him now.”

          And Ms. Know-It-All stormed off determined to grind her axe. I knew nothing good would happen, so I followed staying ten paces behind.

          She said, “Tim, you know you’re not allowed to use your phone.”

          He said, “I’m not using a phone! Jesus, this school is so stupid. Do you see a phone?” He held up his hands as if they were playing cops and robbers.

          “Well, one of my students said that she saw you surfing the internet.”

          Tim started weeping. No shit. Now keep in mind that this kid is seventeen years old.

          She said, “I didn’t mean to upset you.”

          “This school sucks. Who saw me? Give me her name! She’s a goddamn liar.”

          Ms. Know-It-All said, “I’m not going to argue. Let’s just say that phones aren’t allowed, and leave it at that.”

          “But I don’t use my phone! I never play games. My mother doesn’t let me. I want the truth. Who lied about me?”

          She said, “Let’s just drop the matter. We’ll pretend that it never happened.”

          The poor woman tried walking away, but Tim followed her doggedly down the corridor, crying like a baby.

          “Who said that?” he demanded. “It’s not true. Everybody at this retarded school hates me.”

          I gently took him by the arm and led him back to my room. After he was seated, I gave him a piece of gum.

          And now I’m going to tell you motherfuckers the God’s honest truth. American Millennials are the asshole generation. They’re a bunch of virtue-signaling idiots who pollute the Earth with their bullshit sense of morality. I mean, all she had to do was listen to poor old Mr. Buffalo, but that would've been far too simple. Instead, her juvenile ideas about fairness added to my overall stress level. I hope she burns in hell.

          Anyway, I get hot under the collar even thinking about it, so let me move on to other matters.

          The rest of the day went well. I managed to complete all my work. Then I went home and watched Tucker Carlson on YouTube. He is my favorite television personality. If I were a sodomite, I would invite him to the prom. Tucker believes that America is under invasion from illegal immigrants. And I agree with him wholeheartedly. In fact, there are twenty-two million illegals living in my nation as I write this drivel. But we are forced to pretend that undocumented workers are a wonderful boon to the United States, or we get labelled as racist trash.

          I went to bed at 10 p.m. I slept like the dead.

4 comments:

  1. Sovelly solly bigboyNovember 16, 2018 at 10:07 AM

    Mr buffalo.
    The misses and me have been enjoying your blog, especially your love of vintage 80s porn. Can you please be a little more descriptive in your shower scenes. Wed love to know which flicks inspire you.

    Also wed love to hear more about the dragon lady/ms. Perfect. You havent been discussing her much lately.

    Thank you big boy

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Like all great artists, I'm a slave to my muse. But I'll do the best I can.

      Much Ruv.

      Delete
  2. the beast of filth speaks unto our hearts, saying "He must obey the rules just like everybody else", peace be on him.

    amen.

    we are remindered about how that an authority can mold the citizenry by the rules.

    like for example how if you want your populace to be five foot and seven in heighth, then you issue an decree to the effect that persons not five foot seven shall report to the cistern, and then they are summarily cisterned and then your populace is all five seven. it is that simple. and so begat the nations and the racial divides unto the ages of mankind, amen.

    at the border of the union of the states there has been established a climbing wall which separates the sheep from the goats. only the most physically cunning are able to leap across the staggered stones and vault the precipice and hand-over-hand they're way threw the razer wire and scaling the twenty foot heighths.

    and so the successful osmosis of the physcally fitness is underway.

    also they have to anser some questions about the slope of the parabolics and the rate of change of the hypotenuse and so forth. and that is how the selectivity is improving thanks to migrations which are the right of all mankind, amen.

    here they are being selectioned at the border along the texas out skirts, and that will be the improvement of the public education because of the in flux, amen and amen. alleluia.

    here is a screen shot:

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z7ry8G1N_1U

    position the pointing device and engage the click

    lovingkindness upon the highest hights



    ReplyDelete