Saturday, January 26, 2019

Racist White Folk

Chapter 61

          I woke up this morning at 9 a.m. and drank a cup of instant coffee. Then I read the news on my smartphone while taking a nasty shit. A Chinese student studying at Oxford University wrote an editorial about racist white people. He said that he faces microaggressions on a daily basis. For instance, his professors believe that Asians have a propensity to cheat, so his work is scrutinized intensely when he turns in papers. Plus store clerks enjoy making fun of his accent as he purchases noodles for his evening meal. He says that many Chinese people return to the mainland hating westerners because of this racism.

          But here’s the God’s honest truth. Asians are some cheating motherfuckers. Plain and simple. I used to proctor the SAT in Korea, and sharpies would often steal the exams to make a quick buck from overzealous students. Furthermore, Asians frequently butcher the English language. Dealing with their thick accents can be both funny and frustrating at the same time. With that said, Orientals do quite well in America. In fact, they make more money than their Caucasian counterparts. So maybe it’s time for them to stop bitching. We’re living in the twenty-first century, and nobody is forcing them to build a railroad.

          I stepped into my spacious shower. The hot water felt heavenly as it cascaded over my blubber. However, I was simply too tired to masturbate. I’m fifty years old, and I’m no longer the stud that I used to be. I’ll probably be dead soon. My old man died of cancer when he was my age. And we all know how important genes are to health and longevity. Therefore, enjoy me while you can.

          I dried off with one of my wife’s tiny towels. Then I walked downstairs and called my mother using WeChat.

          She said, “I’m very upset with your boy.”

          I said, “What happened?”

          “He said that he’s going to stay out with his friends until midnight, and I think that’s too late.”

          “Did you tell him your feelings on the matter?”

          “No, but I hinted that I want him home by ten. But what can I do? He’s eighteen.”

          “It’s your house, so it’s your rules.”

          “It’s just that I don’t know what he does with those friends of his. For years, I put up with all that drinking from you and your father. I couldn’t handle another drunk in the family. If he starts getting into the booze, I’m sending him back to Korea. I’m too old for that stuff.”

          “He’s not an alcohol freak like me and dad, so let’s not make a big deal out of nothing. But can I give you some advice?”


          “Men don’t respond to hints. You have to hit us over the head, or we just don’t get it. Tell him what you want him to do in clear terms, and you won’t have any problems. He’s a good kid.”

          I decided to wait until midnight Texas time before giving Ken a call. The last thing I wanted to do was scream at him. I was afraid that he might speed back to his humble abode and wrap his car around a telephone pole. So I watched Tucker Carlson and Laura Ingraham on YouTube to kill a couple of hours.

          A friend of Alex Jones named Roger Stone got arrested by the FBI. They dragged him out of his house at seven a.m. with guns drawn. Someone had leaked the story to CNN. They were on the scene and captured the ugly incident on video. The guy’s sixty-six years old, and he certainly poses no flight risk. The justice department should be ashamed of itself for allowing a federal agency to act like a bunch of thugs. But none of us should be surprised. We all remember Ruby Ridge and the disaster in Waco, Texas. Many times, the police act worse than the criminals.

          Just as a side note…This is the second associate of Alex Jones who has been arrested. The feds also slapped the handcuffs on Dr. Jerome Corsi not too long ago. This witch hunt seems endless.

          I called the Chicken Man at two p.m. Beijing time.

          I said, “I’ve got bad news. Granny wants you in by ten p.m. from here on out.”

          “Why? I’m not doing anything wrong.”

          “Are you drinking with your buddies?”

          “I never touch the stuff.”

          “That’s good. Your grandfather was a drunk, and I’ve been known to tip a glass or two. So it’s just best if you avoid the stuff all together. It causes nothing but trouble.”

          “OK. Not a problem. In by ten and no drinking. Got it.”

          “You’re being very mature about this. And I appreciate your attitude. You’re living with a couple of old people, and they’re set in their ways. Besides, you’re smart enough to know that freedom doesn’t really exist. I’ve got a million bosses, and I have to kiss their asses every day of the week. It’s called having a job.”

          “I understand.”

          “You’re a good boy.”

          Later in the day, I watched a film called Bugsy. It stars Warren Beatty and Anette Benning. The movie is about the gangster who started Las Vegas. Everybody thought his idea was a colossal failure, so his best friend hired some thugs and they blew Bugsy’s brains out. Go figure.   


  1. correction:

    I’ve got a million bosses, and I have to kiss their asses every day of the week.
    I’ve got a million bosses, and I have to kiss their asses every day of the week. Tell them how great they are. How beautiful. How right they are. I must massage them and massage their spouse. I must arrange their flights and they hookre appointments. I must launder their cash. I must fork over part of my salary to them. I must do their work for them so they can receive credit. I must bend over and take it deeply and say thank sir may I please have another. I must take their dog to the vet and clean its poop from my car and then visibly grieve when it is euthanized.

    This. Is. Heaven.

  2. Excuse me....we ARE talking about a teenager, right? You either have a unicorn, or else you've done something well. My teenager isn't rude or criminal but m-a-y-b-e he'll do what I say...if he feels like it...sometime.

    It sounds like your boy appreciates the "lottery win" chance you've given him - Respekt!

    1. He's in a unique position. If he doesn't behave, it's back to Korea to serve in the Army. Much Ruv.

  3. There was this tall, middle aged lady that gave massages out of her house in Las Vegas. Her specialty was tantra.

    She was a bit over weight but had that perfect Germanic body with a big ass that was all business. Her tits were enormous and firm, and despite her age and weight, she was still sexy as hell.

    She’d start you off by having you lay down on your stomach with your legs spread and tickle your privates and butt with a feather, while running her hands under your thighs and stomach until you were soaking wet.

    She’d then have you flip onto your back, where she would back her giant ass up to sit naked on your face. Sitting straight up, she’d order you to breathe deeply while she lorded it over you with her dominatrix personality.

    As a final touch she’d have you stand on your knees at the end of the bed facing the headboard. She would get behind you and place one hand on your stomach right above your pubes, while stroking your cock with plenty of baby oil with the other. She’d let you lean back and hold on to her enormous breasts while she stoked you to completion. Holding those giant juggs while getting stroked with baby oil drove me wild, and many was the time that I blasted a load of semen all the way to her headboard as she cooed her appreciation for my cumshot.

    Afterwards shed let you doze off for 10 minutes then awaken you with a cold bottle of water.

    For $100 bucks you can’t beat that with a stick.

    1. Sounds great. But I'm doing my best to walk the straight and narrow. Much Ruv.