Yesterday, I woke up at 5 a.m. and drank a cup of instant coffee. Then I read the news on my smartphone while taking a nasty shit. A famous Chinese actress named Kitty Zhang is in a little bit of trouble with the police. It seems that she got angry and cut her husband two times with a fruit knife. He’s going to be OK physically, but the couple has decided to get a divorce. It’s probably for the best. When you start stabbing your spouse, it’s a good indication that the romance is over.
I really love the Book of Genesis. Plus I believe every word of it. After Eve eats the apple, God lays a big curse on the world. One of the side effects which we see today is that women constantly try to outrank men in the hierarchy of the created universe. Consequently, this never-ending power struggle leads to miserable marriages. Simply put, women have become too uppity. That’s why the divorce rate is so high. But what do I know? I’m just some idiot who writes a stupid blog.
I stepped into my spacious shower. I wanted to beat my meat, but I couldn’t get it up. That happens from time to time. I’m a fifty-year-old teacher, not superman. I quickly washed my fat disgusting body. Then I dried off with one of my wife’s tiny towels.
After I dressed, I called my mother using WeChat.
I said, “How have things been going?”
“Well, your son asked for two months leave from his job during the summer.”
“Two months leave? Is he a fucking idiot? He works at a chicken shack.”
“I tried talking sense to the boy. I told him that Chick-Fil-A isn’t going to hold his position. But he just won’t listen.”
“What are his plans?”
“He still wants to visit Korea in the summer.”
“He’s not afraid of getting drafted into the army?”
She shook her head. “It’s his mother. She called and told him that everything would be OK. Your wife doesn’t believe that the military will take him. She thinks we’re a couple of idiots.”
“I don’t understand Ken. He begged me to let him go to America. You know, he once went three years without getting so much as a hug from that reptile. And now she suddenly wants to be in his life? Why is he falling for her bullshit? It sucks over here.”
“Well, she is his mom. He wants her love. It’s only natural.”
“Christ, what a fucked-up bitch. She can’t go anywhere without spreading misery. The woman’s a black fucking hole.”
“Juan’s not happy. He thinks Ken should stay in America.”
“I’m not happy, either. But what can we do? Next summer, he’ll be eighteen. The kid’s an adult.”
I walked to work with Rice-Boy Larry. I arrived by 7:30 a.m. The teachers at my school are still upset about Mr. Kim’s new educational plan. They believe that the man is a snake-oil salesman.
I said, “I used to work at a school that was divided into Korean and foreign staff. The Korean teachers tortured the children with lots of homework and vocabulary lists, while the foreign teachers kept on doing their thing without interference from the powers that be. The same outcome will probably happen here.”
But many of my colleagues are young firebrands. They don’t believe in compromise. I guess holding onto one’s ideals isn’t the worst thing in the world. However, there’s nothing wrong with a little give and take every now and then. And, when push comes to shove, the direction of the school is completely up to the owner. So I’m certainly not going to lose sleep over shit that probably won’t even affect me. Fuck it. I’ve got other fish to fry.